I don't normally use my blog for a soap box, b*itchfest or for any other form of a complaint department...but I'm taking back that oath because this one really pissed me off- so here it goes.
I am MORE than happy to do blog exchanges with other authors and writers- it's what I do to assist someone in the same industry but when I host you, make you look great and promote you ALL over the Internet, I expected the same in return. *Not being too selfish here I hope*
So I do this gracious offering...now it's my turn to be up on her blog. I send over my blog (her topic, by her request- OK, I can do that). The day it's supposed to go live, I receive an email stating this:
"Hi Dawne,
I was getting ready to publish your guest post on my blog but after reading it I decided I cannot have you as a guest. I totally get the spirit of the post--that sometimes one has to take risks and be bold to get published--but I'm uncomfortable with the message that others will take from it -- that lying is okay. It's just too controversial a topic; I'm pretty new to this publishing thing and don't want to alienate anyone -- -readers or publishing professionals."
Why exactly? She wanted to know how I got into publishing and below is the blog I sent her- you decide...was I wrong to lie? Or was it desperation?
My first adventure into the publishing world was a lie. Not a little one either. It was a point blank lie to an editor at a newspaper.
Now keep in mind this was in 1999, I was unpublished but determined to follow my dream. I had no credentials, no recommendations and no idea how to write a newspaper article. I answered an ad in a local newspaper classified because they were looking for a part-time stringer (contributing writer). I went in the interview with a classy, confident air about me.
Then I lied.
The editor asked me for samples. Oops, I said with a cocksure chuckle. I seem to have forgot them at home and I live forty minutes away. What ever shall we do?
Editor's words, “Well let me give you a test article...it's an easy one.”
I began to sweat...I took the press release from her hand, read the words (didn't comprehend them) but read it just the same. We shook hands, I smiled and left. I had seven days to prove myself. Where to begin? What to do? My brain thinking process was on overload. I went home, grabbed the local phone book, grabbed a notebook and pen and started calling.
Two days later I emailed the article- with rave reviews from the editor. It was published in the next edition...and so my official professional writing career began.
Since then, I've put in a total of ten years as a staff writer and freelancer at various newspapers, published five romance (erotic) novels, published one sex advice book, wrote hundreds of online articles for AOL Seed, Yahoo (Y!CN), askmen, mademan, Cafe Eden, do book reviews for the WM Review Connection, oversee eight blogs daily, coordinate five facebook pages, administer a private romance writers' page on facebook, write erotic greeting card ideas and have a weekly radio segment on a local rock radio station.
So to me, that little lie opened up numerous doors for me and I'm glad I did it.
So now I'm out of a blog exchange... oh well-
Oh dear, it was only a small lie, one that harmed no one and it didn't get your foot in the door. It was your work that got your foot in the door. Had your lie been the reason why you got that job, then I would understand her reasoning for not posting, to a point. I mean, you gave her what she asked for in an honest, upfront way that most would appreciate -- not many would own up to a lie like that, not even a tiny weeny one. So kudos to you, not just for being completely honest, but also for delivering a wonderfully written article. And congrats on the success of your writing career!
ReplyDeleteI hope you can step down from your soap box, chill out, and realize it's not worth getting upset about xx There are more important things you could focus your energy on, say your next article or review ;)
If this harms my writing career in any way then I only have myself to blame for posting it here- but I believe by now I have enough credentials and previous writing background to survive this little snafu of falsehood and continue with my writing.
ReplyDeleteWho hasn't stretched the truth in one way or another in their past? Writing is so hard to get started it begs for dishonesty to grab at the chance. That's all you got, a chance. If you couldn't cut it, you wouldn't be where you are.
ReplyDeleteBut this lady needs to understand it was your story, not hers. If you were willing to fess up then she shouldn't be bothered about it. If she was smart, she would realize that a juicy topic like this could create some interesting, lively discussions and give her blog some notice.
I know someone who was an edit. asst at a magazine and when they posted an ad for a writer, she threw out all the resumes from women from fancy schools...I mean in the wastebasket. She got the job and went on to be an editor there and a damned good writer! You do what you gotta do to get that first chance.
OK- now throwing away potential applicants is worse I have to agree Jean- that's blatant slanderous behavior- I'd like to know one author or writer or can honestly say they haven't lied...About sales? About a rejection? About anything? I doubt they could- We've all done it and as you say this is a tough business to break into- I did what I did for purely selfishness but I would NEVER go back and change it- that moment made me who I am today
ReplyDeleteI'm with you. My friend threw out the apps because they wouldn't consider her at first because she went to Temple University, not Smith or Vassar. She only dumped the resumes from the fancy schools, to give herself a chance. I admit, I wouldn't have had the nerve to do that. But it worked out for her, and for the magazine as well.
ReplyDeleteI agree with you that we all lie from time-to-time regarding careers. Total truth isn't really expected and if all concerned make out well and no one is injured, whose to judge?
Dawne, the number of people who have lied in journalism is staggering. I'm sure that editor knew exactly what was going on and that's why he gave you the test article and didn't just ask you to send in your other sample articles. He wanted to see what you could do, to give you a chance. He had nothing to lose and gained a fantastic writer! It's the person who refused to print your blog who lost out!
ReplyDeleteMy feeling is "she" lost out on a controversial topic that would have brought numerous posts, comments and traffic to her blog- it wouldn't have harmed her career at all
ReplyDeletewow what a tempest in a teapot. to my way of thinking, you didn'texactly lie... and it could even be construed you told the truth: the articles were home which is where they would've been if you'd written them. you didn't lie - you just left a part of the story out. clearly this woman is not a fiction writer...she's no where near creative enough! LOL
ReplyDeleteWow! I think that was a FANTASTICALLY ballsey move on your part, and I would have been proud to host you with that story! How many people WISH they had the nerve to do what you did to get their dream job?! Kudos!
ReplyDeleteHere's a quote you can appreciate today:
"Well Behaved Women Seldom Make History" - Laurel Thatcher.
It's my favorite and fits the today's topic;)
I agree with all who've commented. If this "blogger" you were supposed to be with wanted to remain "true" to the writing industry, then she'd posted your blog. It doesn't get any more real than what you painted in your blog for her. True life! I'd rather have it than the rambling thoughts of an author because we all can relate to them in some way or another. And if this blogger wanted to remain true to her "moral dilemma", then she could have easily posted at the beginning of your blog "the opinions expressed by Dawne do not necessarily reflect the opinions of ___insert name___".
ReplyDeleteShe says she doesn't want to alienate any one, well, what does she think she did to you? You were probably nice about it, but you've got that sour taste in your mouth about her now. Who knows when YOU could have been her so-called LIE that got her foot in the door. You never know who is going to be instrumental in kickstarting your career in this business.
I say it's her loss, Dawne. I thought it was a fabulous post and wouldn't have hesitated to run it at Moonlight, Lace & Mayhem.
~huggles~
Gracen
I agree with everyone! I too would be honored to have posted such a creative and bold move on my blog.
ReplyDeleteNo, I do not condone lying when it hurts someone or serves no purpose but that is not what you did here at all. You could simply have left out the information in your post but no, you took a chance and answered honestly!
We ARE fiction authors after all. Is not what we write every single day also technically lying or stretching the truth? You did not get the job based on the lie but rather on your ability to do that article. If this blog host can not see that then it is truly her loss.
I have you appearing on my blog shortly and I can only say that I chose to interview you so whatever appears in your interview simply does. It is part of your past, your life and oh wait... Your right to do what you had to!
Can we all say that we are so above reproach that we have never fibbed? Let others think we are someone we may not yet be? I don't think so.
Seriously, it's not like you lied about being a brain surgeon or a trial lawyer. The lady didn't have to hire you if you couldn't write. You wrote the piece and did a great job so you got the job. What you did took guts and you didn't abuse anyone to get the job.
ReplyDeleteYou did what you did. This post should have been published.
Oh and can I add... Just LOOK at the traffic that this has generated to this blog!
ReplyDeleteAs a new epublisher myself, I do understand not wanting to damage your rep but seriously, would it really? Is the company so fragile that it can't withstand a simple blog post that could be controversial?
Hey, I had a VERY negative comment made on a post advertising for Naughty Nights Press * shameless plug* a few months back and yes at first it kinda devastated me to think people would see this person's negative opinion but then a very wise person reminded me that whether a good or bad comment the publicity was still keeping the name of my new press co on the lips and minds of others.
In fact, others chose to check out the claims this person made themselves and it really DID result in more traffic to my site.
And guess what... of those that visited, all found that claims that had been made were not necessarily true at all but simply one person's perception.
So I guess my point is would her company have honestly suffered because of your post? Hmmm, traffic is traffic. The name of the company on the lips is not going to be a bad thing in the end if the company can hold true to itself now is it!
It wasn't a lie, it was pure confidence talking. The desire to write, to focus on your craft/art. I'd say, blame it on the muse.
ReplyDeleteAll writers have stories of how they "broke in". I think it's mountian being made from a mole hill.
I'm in total agreement here! Your lie got you in the front door; your WORK got you the job! What I'm wondering is, how long did she have your post before she read it? I prepost mine several days or even weeks in advance, so I can comment if need be. And to let you know the DAY the post was to go live...she could have put a disclaimer at the top, saying the views expressed were not her own. A rookie blogger, I'm guessing.
ReplyDeleteOh My God. It's the end of the world. Blah, blah, blah... I don't see anything wrong with what you did Dawne. You used a harmless lie to prove yourself. People have done much worse to get ahead. There's nothing controversial about that. Plus, you did an excellent job of what the editor wanted so what's the big deal? Keep it moving Dawne and ignore the haters!
ReplyDeleteBravo! You wanted something and weren't afraid to go after it. The other author who decided not to publish your blog only loses out on any people you would've drawn to her blog and possibly purchased her book/books. Her loss.
ReplyDeleteI applaud you for lying your way into the business. It certainly paid off - BIG!
I agree with Robert - people are pretty intuitive and the person interviewing you probably knew you didn't have any articles, so they gave you a test because they admired your gutsiness. If you'd have been a bad writer, it wouldn't have worked out for you. They were probably following your intuition as you were. And as Molly said, she could have put a disclaimer at the top of her blog. But to each his own. I'll host you one day if you want!
ReplyDeleteI'm proud of you for putting this blog up. I'm also proud that you are being professional and have omitted any identifying information about the declining blogger. You've got some real moxy, girl, in a very good way.
ReplyDeletePS- I wonder if said decliner is reading this and squirming in their seat?
Thank you everyone for your comments- I am not surprised with your overwhelming support from all of you mt friends and peers- All the words you have expressed are true and very appreciated- thank you all- now I see why you are ALL my friends and confidantes.
ReplyDeleteWell, your potential host did say she was inexperienced. I think it is a great opportunity to start a topic that will fire up some discussion. That is generally the point of a blog. If she was that worried about it she could have put a disclaimer...like....guests of this blog do not necessarily reflect the opinion of the host.
ReplyDeleteI mean is she an inspirational writer? Seems like there were number of ways to handle this other than just shutting you down.
Dawn you are welcome on my blog any day.
Just let me know when Eden- either I can be humorous, controversial or me...any way though I always have something to say
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed this post immensely.
ReplyDeleteWhile I never would have refused to post your story, it really depends upon the target audience the blogger author is trying to reach, and no one but the main author knows the make-up of that audience or how they will react. So, she was within her right to not post it, especially if she felt it wasn't morally correct.
However, the "decliner" was in the wrong by waiting until posting day to refuse it. If she had a problem with it, she should have given you a chance to write something else, as that's the more professional thing to do.
At least you got quite a fan fair out of this!
Yeah, I think that is actually a great story. I wish you'd brought it to me--I'd have published it on WMF. I mean, as so many have pointed out, that is an honest story that probably more than one writer can relate to in one way or another. This is the kind of post that goes viral, if you ask me. (Well, just look at all these comments! See what she missed out on?) Her loss, I say. :) You're a great writer, Dawne, and I hope you didn't let that blogger get you down--she is clearly clueless.
ReplyDelete